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Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim. Alhamdulillahi Rabbil ‘Alameen. Wa salatu wa salamu ala sharifil anbiya wal mursaleen, Muhammadur Rasulullah ﷺ, wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa sallam. Tasliman kathiran kathirahum. My brothers and sisters, alhamdulillahi wa bismillahi ta’ala. We are starting the Mubarak days of Hajj. Today is the first day. Today, we ask Allah to help us do those actions which please Him. Because the actions, good actions done on these days, are the best of all the year. Because these days are more beloved to Allah than any other days of the year. So we ask Allah for that. The corollary to all such things is also the opposite: if a day is Mubarak, and doing something good on that day is the best, then doing something bad on that day is the worst. Right? For example, stealing something is a sin. But stealing the same thing from the masjid—is it the same? No. Because you are stealing from the masjid. And supposing you go and steal in the Ka’bah. There are people who are doing this. When people are doing Tawaf, they are stealing from them. They are, you know, literally my mother-in-law, may Allah fill her khawar with noor and grant her janatul firdous. When she went for Hajj, a group of women surrounded her. And she said she literally lost consciousness. When she woke up, she was on the Mataf, on the floor.
Her ihram had been slit open with a knife, obviously.
Mercifully, she was wearing a belt; otherwise, she would have been disemboweled.
The belt was cut, and passports, and money—everything was gone. She and my father-in-law and my brother-in-law were there; there were three or four people together. So, the passports and the money were all taken. But Allah Ta’ala saved her life; otherwise, she would have died having been killed. This happened in the Ka’bah, meaning in the Masjid al-Haram, next to the Ka’bah.
The reason I am saying this is because these days also let us be careful and not indulge in things which are displeasing to Allah Subh’anahu Wa Ta’ala. So yes, we should do good, but if you cannot do good, at least don’t do evil.
The most common evil we do is ghibat (backbiting), speaking about other people, saying negative things about them. Right? We may not be stealing and we may not be doing other haram things, but we should understand that ghibat is the haram of the harams. Because Allah Subh’anahu Wa Ta’ala specifically prohibited that in the Qur’an in Surah Al-Hujurat. And Allah Subh’anahu Wa Ta’ala compared it to eating the flesh of your dead brother. Allah did not compare anything else in this way. He did not say drinking alcohol is equal to doing something else which is nasty. But regarding backbiting, He mentioned specifically: “Woe to every sinner who eats the flesh of his dead brother.” This is something which, may Allah have mercy on us, has become like a common practice. It is our social life; it is our social talk. And it’s not only women—it is men and women, all the same. The moment people get together, the moment you open your mouth, it is about somebody else. They say the worst of people are those who talk about other people. Better than them are those who talk about issues.
Right? But even talking about issues is not a great thing because you are wasting your time. Still, if you must talk, talk about principles—values, ethics, morals, things like this. Right? So if you have to talk, talk about something useful. Talk about the greatness and glory of Allah Subh’anahu Wa Ta’ala, which is the best of the best. Let us not spoil these days by wasting time in that. Let’s spend time in recitation of the Quran, in making zikr (remembrance), and so on, but do not use the tongue for anything else.
And the reason we do this is because we have this other thing about talking about people: we think public opinion is important. We have an expectation regarding what people will say. Low cavilling. If you ask people why they do something wrong, consider weddings and funerals as two areas where maximum evil happens. In the name of a wedding, there are all kinds of khurafat (superstitions). You know, saachak, mehendi, and what else? Then the wedding itself, then the fourth night, then the valima, then how many nights? Five, seven, Friday. Now, if you take out a new thing by speaking music—which was not there before but is now—earlier, people used to speak Dhulak songs, now they have taken it out. The point is, Islam has given you a beautiful system where marriage literally costs nothing; zero.
The mahr is given by the groom.
Do the nikah in the masjid with zero cost. There is no cost involved. And then do a valima modestly. Call people who are close to you. Do the valima, finished. Khalas.
And I always tell people: if you have so much money, and if you want to spend the money on the marriage of your daughter or son, give the money to them.
Invest it for them. Buy a flat for them. Right? Why do you spend the money on the phool wala (flower vendor) and the khana wala (catering vendor) and the shadi khana wala (wedding hall)? What sense does that make? We don’t give any low cavilling. “What will people say?”
So, I remind myself and you: please, you are neither that interesting nor are you that important. You may think so, but nobody else cares about you and your mother except yourselves, right? That people have time to think about you and talk about you—sorry, don’t fool yourself.
Number two: if you think public opinion is so important, then tell me, how come we have political leaders in every country who are reviled? The moment you take the name of that political leader, people curse him. Then you tell me, how is it possible that this person is sitting on the throne? Or the equivalent of the throne?
He is so unpopular. How does he have that position? He has got elected, no? We are not talking about hereditary monarchs; we are talking about people who got elected. How did he get elected?
So, no matter who is in your favor, there will be somebody who is against you. And the opposite: no matter who is against you, there will be somebody in your favor. Makes no difference.
There is a lovely story about Marana Jalaluddin Rumi, Rahmatullah Ali. He invited his sheikh, Shams Tabrezi, Rahmatullah Ali, to his house for dinner. So when Shams Tabrezi came and sat down, food was being brought. Shams Tabrezi, Rahmatullah Ali, said to Marana Jalaluddin Rumi, “Get me a bottle of wine.”
So Marana Jalaluddin Rumi was absolutely flabbergasted. He said, “Get me a bottle of wine.” He said, “Shut up.” So he said, “Yes, Sheikh.” I mean, what are you saying? He said, “Get me a bottle of wine.” He said, “You will drink wine?” He said, “Yes.”
Varun sir, what?
How can I get you wine? He said, “Send your servant.” Varun sir, if I send my servant, if I tell my servant to bring wine… He said, “What will happen? My servant will, you know, they will think I have gone mad or something. How can I send my servant?” So Shams Tabrezi said to him, “Then you go and bring it.”
Yeah? If you can’t send your servant, you go bring it.
So Marana Jalaluddin Rumi said, this is next: You want to drink wine? You want me to go bring the wine for you? What is this?
So Shams Tabrezi said to him, “You either bring the wine; otherwise, I will not eat. I will not drink. I will not sleep. I will not move from here until you bring the wine. If you are my murid, this is my command to you. Hook up. Go, do it.” Now Marana Jalaluddin Rumi was absolutely confused. He doesn’t know what to do. So anyway, he took, he put on some disguise—he tied his turban, put something on top of him, wrapped his face up, and so on. Only two eyes showing. He went into the Christian quarter of the town wh
Once, there was a man who owned a wine shop. He went to the shop and asked the owner for a bottle of wine. The owner gave him a bottle of vinegar instead. Shams Tabrizi saw this. Soon, people noticed him. This is our Imam, Jalaluddin Rumiﷺ. Where was he going at night? People assumed he was heading to the Christian quarter. They followed him. When they arrived, he entered the liquor shop. He came out holding a bottle, hiding it from view. A commotion ensued as people surrounded him demanding to see the contents. Eventually, someone grabbed the bottle. Upon inspection, they realized it contained vinegar. They started cursing, reviling, and spitting on him, beating him until his turban fell off and he lay on the ground in a mess. Almost everyone thought he had committed a major sin.
At that moment, Shams Tabrizi arrived. He asked the crowd what they were doing and told them to leave the man alone. When they persisted, saying he was drinking wine, Shams Tabrizi pointed to the bottle: “Look at the bottle.” It was clearly vinegar. He explained, “I sent him to bring me some vinegar.” The crowd felt immense regret, apologized profusely, returned his turban, picked him up, and begged for forgiveness. The drama concluded.
When they returned home, Shams Tabrizi spoke to the man in the room: “These are the very people whose opinion you worry about.” He continued, “What will they say? These people have no sense. They do not know what you are doing; they lack evidence. Their minds are fickle, shifting opinions here and there.”
The man asked how the bottle became vinegar. Shams Tabrizi replied, “It did not become vinegar. Before I came, I went to the shop and told the owner: ‘Jalaluddin Rumiﷺ will come. Give him vinegar.’ The owner refused, saying, ‘No, give him wine.’ So, when you brought it back, I knew it was vinegar because of our prior arrangement. That is enough.”
This story illustrates a profound reality applicable to anyone and anything. People get easily bothered by others’ words. Sometimes people speak good things about us, *Alhamdulillah*. If they speak evil, they are actually giving us their own good deeds. Thank Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala. When someone speaks ill of you, they are using their good deeds against themselves. You receive free good deeds as passive income without doing anything yourself. This is real spiritual capital that you take with you into the Hereafter. Because people talk badly, let them talk. It makes no difference in this world or the next. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala does not ask people what they thought of so-and-so.
My reminder to you and myself is to ensure we do not spoil the virtue of these days by talking about people. Do not make gossiping a habit in your life. Whenever you are in a gathering where someone is discussing another person, you have two options: Stop them immediately and say, “We are not here to talk about anybody,” or if you cannot stop them, get up and walk away. Allah has given you legs; use them to leave. Do not sit there listening. If you listen to gossip, you become part of that group. Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala will treat you just like the gossiper. Even passively listening counts as participating. The sound enters your ear, placing you with those speakers.
This rule also applies to religious issues regarding which we lack knowledge. People often discuss matters with centuries of research behind them, yet apply their own limited understanding. They declare things *haram* based on superficial thoughts. Please do not speak about Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala, His promises, or His verses without proper knowledge. Either acquire the knowledge first, or keep your mouth shut. If others are speaking ignorantly, walk away.
Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala says that some people left Islam after accepting faith because they made fun of the verses of Allah and mocked the Prophet Muhammadﷺ. This happens frequently in so-called intellectual circles where people mock what they do not understand through sarcasm or remarks. We must avoid this. The best approach is to have as few people in your life as possible. Limit yourself to beneficial friends—those who remind you of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala, remind you of the Akhirah (Hereafter), and from whom you learn something useful. This definition comes from Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam. Anyone else is not a good friend; stay away.
We must guard our deeds. I always remind myself: “We do not have so many good deeds in our lives that we can afford to give away.” When someone takes some, you lose some. We do not have plenty; only Allah knows what we possess. May Allah have mercy on us. Let us protect our limited good deeds so that when we stand before Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala, we still have something left. We ask Allah to save us from ourselves, from Shaytan, and from our *nafs* (ego). May Allah enable us to perform the best deeds during these days, accept them, and forgive our sins and shortcomings. Wa sallallahu ala nabil kareem wa ala alihi wa sahbihi ajmain wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.